Terrier Garage

We’re in a bit of a holding pattern here at Two Terrier Vineyards thanks to our recent unseasonable rains. After our panic harvest ahead of the storm, I’m now waiting for the one varietal still left in the field to dry out a bit before we bring that in. We should probably be scrambling to get ready for the real rainy season, but the guys did such a good job with erosion control systems last year — including our own version of the Suez Canal — that we don’t have much that needs shoring up. Meanwhile, it’s gotten hot again so it isn’t really planting season. (Yes, it’s all backwards in California when you are talking about restoring native habitat. You do it at the start of the rainy season which usually begins around late November.) So the guys figured it was as good a time as any to take a break and work on vehicles.

No sooner had that decision been made sometime around 7AM, when two ATVs, a Range Rover and a tractor were in various disassembled states and DJ and Louis were up to their elbows in grease. Two terriers took the opportunity of an open garage to prowl around looking for fence lizards that had skittered behind various car parts. And a new enterprise was born: Flying Terrier Garage.

It was explained to me what was happening here, but you know that car stuff just goes over my head. DJ is changing the fan belt and Louis is changing the oil filter, I think. But does it matter? Shit's getting done!

Louis confers with his Terrier Overlord on proper tractor maintenance.

Can I just point something out here? If you’ve been reading this blog for any amount of time, you will have seen these guys doing various things around here. Like expert native habitat restoration and building trails and even being a Winemaker’s Apprentice. Can I add that they also do electrical work and build structures and mend fences. In college, we would call such people Renaissance men. I suspect out here, the more common term would be “getting shit done”. Do you know how rare it is to find people who can actually do shit? Real stuff. Not just theoretical things but leaving the workplace at the end of the day with something built or restored or fixed? I’m still trying to find something these guys can’t do or build or fix.

So, impressed, I was hovering around taking pictures and, of course, not understanding anything that was going on. DJ was patiently trying to explain to me how he was going to change an air filter when he didn’t have the right wrench or some such thing. He said he was going to “Redneck Fix It”. That sounded to me like he was going to hit it with a beer bottle and sing Toby Keith songs to it. But he defined it as “fixing something in a way no one else would think of.” Okay, I’ll buy that. And I’ll add that he did use improvised methods, none of which included beer bottles. Or Toby Keith.

DJ wears the appropriate gear to explain the term "Redneck Fix It".

These guys did complete maintenance and repair on two ATVs, a tractor and a Range Rover in less than a day and a half. Of course, they had terriers breathing down their necks.

Did I mention all of this was accomplished with blaring country music coming out of a car radio? Which I approve of in theory. Yet, I had to disapprove of the fact that it was modern country, not the classics. Apparently, the soundtrack du jour was someone named Justin Moore, who sounded interesting and somewhat Old School. He sings a song called “I Could Kick Your Ass” which seemed to indicate some Johnny Cash/Waylon Jennings/Willie Nelson Outlaw tendancies. Then I heard lyrics which disparage Prius drivers. Can’t have that in these parts.

However, in all fairness and to keep an open mind, I went back to the laptop and googled his lyrics and listened to a few songs on YouTube. A song called “Hank It” was promising with these lyrics:

You gotta Hank it
You can’t sip whiskey, gotta drink it
Push it up to ten and crank it

Live it just like he sings it
You gotta Hank it

This guy was growing on me. Until I read on further and found a reference to Bocephus. Who isn’t the late great, incomparable Hank Williams, but the decidedly inferior Hank Williams, Jr. I know this guy is a young singer, but you’ve got to know your Pantheon.

So maybe I’ve found the one thing these guys can’t do. Oh, they can do a lot of shit. But when it comes to good Country, I’m afraid they don’t know shit.

In the interest of fairness, here’s Justin Moore — singing appropriately about trucks and farm equipment. You be the judge. I’m saying not another Johnny, Willie or Waylon.